Saturday, 21 February 2015


I know that you're still here. Submissive, for now. Hiding in the dark, time-worn fractures in my creativity that you carved long ago, on another visit. The very same fractures that had started to heal, to repair themselves. But then you returned. You forced your way into my head, and here you've stayed, subtle. You haven't shown for the past few hours, which is why I'm here, writing to you, now. 

Because no matter what, I know that you're somewhere, though unwanted. So you must read ahead carefully: curtain your attempts at barricading me. Stop. 

I see you smirking, laughing at my naivety. You think you're unbeatable. Well, read on. As it turns out, I have a lot to say to you. 

First of all, you will stop. If not by will, by force.

So here I am, doing that with the brute force of words. Paving my way into your vile lair with these words you stole from me, but that I've now found. Stringing letters, wild shapes, into sentences, and sentences into paragraphs: here I am, hand-crafting my way in. Sprinting along the top of these paved words and swinging with determined force from each descender of every gjqp and y, I am making my way.

For when these words have formed my path, I will enter your lair. I shall crawl in amongst the dreams you've cracked and tear down the tormenting barriers to creation you installed, sending them tumbling, tumbling down and down and down along the path of words I built, away from here. And then, when the barricades are down and you sit exposed, I will charge into your hollow existence, like a warrior on horseback, unrepentant, completing my mission. 

And when I reach you, when I lift you from your hidey-hole and hold you up in the light glaring from my re-instated eyes, you will not have won. Because I will free creation from your prison, and lo behold, I shall create! Oh, what the joys will be! I will empty my body of accumulated thoughts and ideas and spill them eagerly onto paper.

But first, I must rid the place of your over-hanging presence, letting the acidic disinfectant of my embittered words annihilate all reminders of your unsought sojourn. I must retrieve my inspiration and I must glue back-together the fragments of starry-eyed dreams that you shattered. 

And then, once these tasks are complete, I shall let my freshly-sought words stream from my lips and allow them to fall upon you. My words will weigh you down and wrap themselves around you like a snake suffocating its prey. My words that shall surround you shall be that of  your elongated defeat. The very set of words that broke down the walls to creativity and found their way into your lair, will be your defeat. They will chain you away and stop the pain. They will, time and time again, prove that you were always, always, beatable.

You may have woven thorns into creation, carved self-doubt into art, splintered my best assets, impaled all inspiration and choked expression into merciless manacles, but you are not the winner here.

Because, look. My words have now achieved their purpose. I have created that path, I have beaten down the barriers and I have chained you into your self-crafted prison. Karma, is what that's called.

You are abolished, eradicated, obliterated. My words that you held back for so long have regained their strength. And oh, how angry you made them. But they came back from the depths of your lair, with vengeance, and oh, how they delivered what you deserved.  

I will always win. A fire needs fuel, heat and oxygen. The fire is my fiery ability to create. The fuel is my desire, the heat is my burning passion and the oxygen is your raspy breaths forever trying to limit me. But they only act as a source of motivation. I know that you'll always be here, or close by, waiting to pounce, but know, you must know, that I will always be ready with a torrent of words spilling from my mind to control you. To put you back where you belong. Because you are simply an obstacle, a challenge to prosperity. But never, never, unbeatable.

Yours faithfully,

The writer that you failed to defeat. 

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